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**Very Personal Story** You Are NOT Alone

I just want to start by saying that I leave the past in the past and leave all the bad that I can in the past

But what some people don’t understand is that no matter what you do sometimes you can have unknown, unwanted, and random triggers.

What are triggers?

They are things unforeseen that will pull back bad memories in a flash weither you want to remember them or not.

All that being said I was just watching some movies on Netflix and in a one movie a woman was being beaten and thrown around by her husband, and without fail I flash back.

There I am crying, slammed onto the floor.

I look up and there is nothing in his eyes just black holes like he is completely gone.

I cannot breathe, his hands, both hands are pushing against my neck and I just cannot breathe.

Gasping for air, and everything goes black.

That’s all I remember from that one.

All I could is cry for a minute. Then I was able to calm down and appreciate that all that I have been through has gotten me to the amazing place I am in my life right now. It just sucks sometimes, and it

Stresses me out to not be able to watch a movie or a show without unwanted flashes of the worst memories of my life.

Another part that sucks is that the person that does the damage and pain never has flashbacks, they normally just forget it altogether.

It must be nice. I wish that was the case and at lease some guilt was felt more.

But who am I to say that he doesn’t remember, feel guilty, and wish he hadn’t done it.

What do you think?

I have long forgiven the person that did it to me but that kind of damage and pain will forever creep back unwillingly and without notice.

What are your thoughts on this?

Has this ever happened to you?

Have you ever done something that forever caused pain and damage for someone?

Feel free to share, no judgment either way I am just curious and it’s better to share the good and bad in life to let people know sometimes that they are not alone. Feel free to share this post! it might just help someone realize that they are NOT ALONE!

You-Are-Not-Alone

 

 

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4 thoughts on “**Very Personal Story** You Are NOT Alone

  1. I know what you mean. Whenever I pass the railway station that was the stop for my college, where I had a very bad 5.5 years of my formative life, I get all sweaty, nervous, remember old things and wish I had never come.
    Same with certain people who I associate with my past, who I feel did not do right with me, I cannot meet them- my blood pressure goes up even when I think of them.
    Man has long long elephantine memories- where it is not needed and not so long ones where it is needed- for example, every year I forget my parent’s wedding anniversary and offend them not a little. I wish I remembered things like those that mattered instead of things I should long ago have forgotten.
    Susie

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  2. I haven’t to anyone else physically. I’ve had breakups that didn’t go well, but they weren’t life-altering. However, I did see my mom abused. The last time it happened was the night we left for good. He had already hit her, then as we got out of the house and were about to pull out, he smashed the passenger window in with his fist and I sped off with her sitting there in shock. It was a surreal experience and an image I’ll never forget. That was nearly 30 years ago, and it still triggers at times.

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